Well Me is awesome! Only problem is, she’s not around when I need her …
Unwell Me can be really unwell! She needs a lot of looking after.
This site is about how Well Me can look after Unwell Me.
When I’m depressed, I can’t think. I stand in the middle of my kitchen in despair, looking at all the mess around me, utterly overwhelmed, seeing only the bad and thinking I need to fix it, right now, when I am least able. I can’t think straight. I can’t remember what helped last time I felt this way. I can’t remember how to make a decision. I can’t work out what to do, where to look, how to proceed. There’s no-one who can help, no-one I believe when I feel like this, no advice that seems to make sense. All I feel is a desperate desire to escape from my own skin, to get away from this feeling, this kitchen, this life. I can’t seem to stand one minute of this, let alone the days or weeks I know it will last.
And then a friend reminds me I have a list. I have a list of what to do when I’m like this. A list my better self, my well self, made for me, and I am *so* grateful to my past self. The list tells me what to do, and how. It tells me what I need to buy at the shops, what to make for dinner, what to do with myself. It reminds me of what might work, and of what certainly doesn’t work. It has quotes that lift my spirit, just a little, just enough to know there is hope, a light. It has pictures that I can’t help but smile at, forcing my brain to make beta-endorphins that improve my mood. My better-self knows these things.
And this is what I want to share with you. My list. My ability to look after myself. My time-machine that allows well-me, who knows what I need, to look after depressed-me, even when they’re never available at the same time. I know I will continue to have episodes of depression, that’s not optional … but what I CAN do is prepare for them, make them easier, perhaps shorter, and definitely less stressful.
Here’s some of what this group/website/book will guide you through:
Things to do whilst you’re well:
- How to prepare a meal-plan and shopping list
- Learn about freezer cooking, and have some meals ready
- Writing a letter to loved ones, to help them understand and support you
- Plan a safe space
- Find out what foods work for you (Radiant Recovery)
- Create an emergency tidying plan
- Make a list of phone numbers of people you can call – friends, family, lifeline etc. Actually do this!!!
Things to do (and NOT do) when you’re depressed:
- Eat breakfast if there’s any way you possibly can
- Do NOT beat yourself up when your usual tools don’t work – that’s normal
- Put tablets in weekly divider container, so you don’t forget them – or at least know if you have