Here’s a simple yet effective exercise for challenging or changing negative beliefs. In my experience, affirmations by themselves don’t work – my brain just goes “nup. nup. nup.” This is a different approach, where you kinda “weed out” the bits that are going “nup”. Give it a go. I find it extremely powerful! Find a […]
Belief Changing Exercise, by Bob Mandel Read More »
“The order of change – We may begin deep listening with the hope that something inside that is angry, scared or hurting will change. But it is not the angry, scared or hurt place that changes first. We change first, by learning to relax in the way we hold our anger, fear or hurt places.
Deep inner listening Read More »
I can tell you my life story and make it sound like I’ve had the most amazing and wonderful life ever, or I can tell it so you’d feel terribly sorry for me and all my woes. Same life. Different story. And when i tell myself my life story, I have the same choice. I
Rewrite your story Read More »
It’s hard for me to catch a thought when I’m depressed. I’m so identified with them that they don’t even seem like thoughts, more like “lived realities”. But if I can notice a thought I’m having (like “it’s too hard”, or “no-one cares anyway”) then I can do something with it, like processing it with
OK, so you’ve worked out what your faulty thinking is … but no matter what you do, it still keeps showing up, and affecting your life in negative ways? Yeah, me too, for many years. Just knowing about it isn’t always enough. So along the way I’ve tested a zillion tools to change beliefs, most
How to change negative beliefs Read More »
There’s plenty of evidence to show how gratitude makes us SO much happier … but when we’re depressed, it’s hard to go there!! Instead, try to think of some things that give you just a tiny smile … a particular colour, a certain type of art, a particular piece of comedy, a song? It’s been
Notice the positive Read More »
If I’m not finding the answer to a question, like “How can I feel better?”, try the opposite question eg “What would I have to do to feel worse?”, or even “What do I need to do to stay right where I am?”, or “What would I need to have done to get where I
Instead of “I’m feeling … “, try “Something in me is feeling … ” (thank you, Anne Weiser Cornell!) And for problem thoughts, “I’m having the thought that … ” (thank you, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy!) Bookmark0