I just read Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It, by Kamal Ravikant – short eBook, currently $2.99, plus audio version $2.99; free summary by James Clear – I liked it! The basic premise is to just repeat “I love myself” over and over in your head, even if you don’t believe it, and breathe out whatever comes up in response. The theory is that your neural pathways will adapt. I reckon you have to have a certain amount of self-love to start with, otherwise this will be too hard … OR the “gift of desperation” might be enough.
The book also suggests you continually ask yourself, “If I love myself truly and deeply, would I let myself experience this?”
Not working? Try the Bob Mandell exercise using the words “I love myself”. If you up with a really “sticky” thought about why NOT to love yourself (like, “It’s not OK to love myself”) then try Byron Katie’s 4 questions on that. (Note that these probably need to be done while you’re reasonably well – my Unwell Self would just tell these ideas to Fuck the Fuck Off.)
